The Feelings Wheel is a visual tool that helps children (and adults!) develop the awareness and vocabulary that supports the management and regulation of emotions. It was created by Robert Plutchik to organise 8 basic emotions into a coloured visual tool to understand emotions and related physiological experiences. Gloria Wilcox was inspired by Plutchik's model and designed a simpler version that many of us are familiar with today. This model is usually recommended to support children.
Have you ever asked a child, “How are you feeling?” only to be answered with the word fine. Or perhaps they reply with an emotion “umbrella” word, also known as core emotion words such as sad or angry. Our emotional experiences are often more complex than these simple words can convey. The Feelings Wheel provides a range of expressive words that can help children develop a more accurate description of how they are feeling. To make use of The Feelings Wheel begin in the centre and find the emotion that seems to most closely match how the child is feeling. You can then progress to the outer circles within the same colour triangle to support the child with identifying their feelings with more accuracy. Benefits of using a Feelings Wheel:
Some ideas for using a Feelings Wheel
The Feeling Wheel is a simple, yet powerful tool to support the development of Emotional Intelligence. Download your free printable Feelings Wheel below!
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Mental health is a hot topic of conversation these days. Mental Health Awareness Week or not we're all talking about it. A lot. Outside of my work with children and their parents, friends are talking about their own mental health, and my social media feeds are full of advice, personal stories, insight and even products that will help. Here's why I think this is awesome ... (POV!) my understanding of mental health is that it informs our human experience of life. Mental health is now being seen not only as a term that includes specific diagnosis and disorder anymore, but as a more general term that we can all relate to in some shape or form. We are beginning to understand that mental health (thoughts, emotions, behaviours and social wellbeing) AND physical health together inform our experience of what it means to be human. However, our experiences are very much our own. The downside of all the conversation that is happening now, is that we run the risk of assuming someone else's description of mental health is a measure our own. One person's idea of anxiety may be very manageable, whereas for others, it may be quite unbearable! This is why I love building children's self-awareness in sessions because they get to learn about how emotions feel for them. Self-awareness is a key pillar of emotional intelligence and gives children the ability to name what they feel and learn what they need to move through emotions. Interoception activities develop this self-awareness. Body Mapping or Body Scan is such as simple and powerful way of helping children tune into their body sensations (developing interoception, a sense that helps us understand our inner sensations) and become aware of their (probably very normal) emotions! Every child I've worked with has felt less overwhelmed by their big feelings once they've explored how that shows up in their body. Why is this important for emotional wellbeing? Well, our brains are constantly monitoring our body so it can make decisions. This is usually something that happens outside of our conscious awareness. This is how we know that we need to drink water or go to the toilet. When it comes to emotions, we also experience changes to our body internally. Our breathing, heart rate and body temperature are all examples of how our might change in response to an emotion. Becoming aware of sensations and then applying this the context of the situation we are in can help us regulate emotions and improve our decision making. So, for example, it's reflecting on body sensations in the context of going to a football game that will help a child learn to tell if they feel excited or scared. Imagine feeling intense physical sensations associated with big emotions and stress responses and not understanding that this is linked to the spelling test you're about to sit. These experiences can be extremely overwhelming for children. When they become aware that their physical signs of emotional stress are linked to situations in which they are actually safe, they are then more able to regulate their physical and emotional experience. Our Emotion Sorting Activity Programme (click the image to learn more about this programme) contains a body mapping exercise, including a session plan to follow too! I’d strongly recommend parents and educators take the time to do a body mapping exercise when trying to support a child through a situation that is causing some big emotions. Aside from developing self-awareness for the child, these activities are also great ways to connect and understand the child you are supporting.
There are a few things you could focus on to help children tune into their physical sensations, developing their sense of interoception:
Exploring emotions through the sensations experienced and the context of the emotion, such as thoughts and day to day events or situations is a way we can start children on their emotional and personal development journey. These are life skills that support emotional intelligence, mental health and wellbeing. Understanding physical sensations and how they link to emotions supports regulation skills and together these skills underpin overall wellbeing. We should't underestimate the impact of developing children's interoception on their wellbeing. Try Body Mapping and see what great conversations happen!
In our busy, modern world it is VERY tempting for us as parents to try to sweep our children’s emotions away. Instinctive responses such as ‘you’ll be fine’, ‘there’s no point worrying about it’ or ‘well, you’re good at this subject aren’t you so the exam will be easy’, often leave our mouths before we’ve realised and come from a place of wanting our children to be ok.
It can also be extremely difficult for us emotionally when our child is overwhelmed. We are often unconsciously triggered emotionally, whether that be because of our own past experiences or because we are tired and have an ‘empty tolerance cup’. After a busy day at work, you are likely to become emotionally triggered if, at 6PM the night before the exam, your child comes to you upset and worried. You would certainly not be alone if you rolled your eyes in frustration and exasperatedly said, “And now you tell me!’' Or wearily yawned 'You’ll be fine” and sent them to bed with a ruffle of the hair. What our children really need from us in their emotionally challenging moments is to feel understood. When we try to sweep them on through their feelings at speed, we may get some short-term relief from the discomfort of being around a child with big feelings. I get it. Sometimes the crying, whining or the general energy that emotions bring (the tween door slam gives me an instant tense, tight jaw!) is just too much. But if we always brush them away or try to fix the issue, children can sense our discomfort of big emotions. This becomes a missed opportunity to develop emotional intelligence and teach them healthy habits. Rushing our children through big emotions or ‘fixing’ the issue teaches our children to suppress, avoid or use other unhealthy habits to cope with their big emotions. It can also lead to feelings of shame around experiencing challenging emotions. Although difficult and requiring our own self growth, our children need us to show them that it’s OK to sit with big feelings, accept them and become curious. Reassuringly, research shows that even doing this just some of the time is effective, which gives us some space to be human! It’s important to remember that pushing feelings away tends to lead to them popping back up with increased force! Repeatedly! The more we can support our children in these moments the more their emotional intelligence will grow. Big feelings will settle when children feel listened to and understood, even if the reason for their emotions seem nonsensical to us. One question that can help in a challenging emotional moment is to ask your child, “What do you need?”. “What do you need?”. A simple, powerful question! With just these four words you can:
Try it next time and see what happens! |
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AuthorHey! I'm the founder, creator and voice of Ink and Scribbles. Sharing thoughts on child well-being and parenting that are based on my teaching and parenting experience, and NLP learning. |